Oh, dear, I'm sorry. I know how hard these decisions are.
I faced a similar issue with a beloved cat -- 14 years old when she developed cancer. In the end, I did not put her through chemo. As you say, animals can't know the purpose or goal of extreme medication; they can't make informed choices about what they might want. All they know is that they are sick and in pain. I felt that giving my cat chemo would have been something I would have done for my sake, not for hers (the vet said we could buy her perhaps six more months, and I thought, what good would six months be if they are filled with scary vet visits and side effects?) So I elected to let her go while she was still feeling pretty good.
Still, putting her down was very painful, and I have had caring friends who have made the opposite decision: they've given their pet chemo, and the pet came through it well, and there was over a year of happy life added.
So I don't want to try to push you in one direction or the other; everyone has to do what they think best, and each animal's situation is different.
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I faced a similar issue with a beloved cat -- 14 years old when she developed cancer. In the end, I did not put her through chemo. As you say, animals can't know the purpose or goal of extreme medication; they can't make informed choices about what they might want. All they know is that they are sick and in pain. I felt that giving my cat chemo would have been something I would have done for my sake, not for hers (the vet said we could buy her perhaps six more months, and I thought, what good would six months be if they are filled with scary vet visits and side effects?) So I elected to let her go while she was still feeling pretty good.
Still, putting her down was very painful, and I have had caring friends who have made the opposite decision: they've given their pet chemo, and the pet came through it well, and there was over a year of happy life added.
So I don't want to try to push you in one direction or the other; everyone has to do what they think best, and each animal's situation is different.
But I'll be thinking of you.